Lent is here...

Never in my 34 years have I ever been concerned with Lent. I grew up baptist and they just don't celebrate Lent. I marvel at the entire concept and this year more than ever, I am just so hungry for these 40 days. Seriously - like starving - for this process.



Father God, I humbly come before you and ask you to "show up" in a big way in my life and in my home. I need you and I truly desire to come to know you intimately. I am constantly amazed in my life how you "show up" time and time again in ways that allow me to grow and change and heal. I know you are always with me, but the "show up" times are times when I say, "Hello God - you're here - you really are here". I ask that in these 40 days you give me the signs to stop and find you. I need clarification on some things, God, and I need you to light them up with neon signs this time so I don't miss them. Prepare my heart in such a way that I hear you very clearly. Jay and I need your direction and wisdom and need to follow you desperately, no matter what the scenery of life make look like. I pray that your neon signs will light our way. I pray for peace like I've never experienced before. You know my hurts and you know just what triggers them, so I pray for protection of my heart and soul. I pray that you would manifest yourself right in front of Amber and Emma and that they may see you for themselves and know that it's you. They are already asking of you, Lord, and they so want to hear from you. That yearning that you place in us is really present in them and they are seeking Lord. Just like the rest of us. We are all seeking and may we be like the little children and come unto you. Always seeking and asking, always looking for love and acceptance, and always finding it with you. And trusting your answer "just because you said so". Annoint me Father and my entire household. We know you hold our hands and help us to walk with you these next 40 days.

Amen

RIP Lubby

You sweet, sweet dog - for fourteen long years. I can't believe your gone. I miss you chupsters. Mommy loves Lubby...

Lubby is gone...

Lubby just passed away a few mintues ago. Jay and I were with him as he took his last breaths. He was laying on his favorite blanket here in the living room and he didn't suffer. Oh my, too many words and not knowing what to say. Just pray for us as we have to tell the girls when they get home and take him to Grammy's backyard for a burial. Will post more later. It's going to be a long day and I'm already tired...

It's Friday...lots of thoughts in my head

Well, so much to say and not sure how. Just lots of thoughts swirling in my head on this Friday. I'm sitting here listening to my 14 year old dog, Lubby, breathing heavy and resting during his last few days with us. The time has come and I believe he will be passing away soon. He has been an amazing dog, and I will post later about all of that. Just know that I am in a season of my life where I'm having to say good-bye again, but trusting in God still. That's kind of all I know how to do, anyway!

I have a few friends on my mind today. They are hurting and need love and healing. Oh, my friends, aren't we all searching for that peace, acceptance and healing? Why does it always seem something is missing? Oh, Father, help me to realize in a very real way that you are right here with me holding me up - and for my friends to feel that, too.

Tomorrow is valentine's day and love is in the air. Some people want to boycott the day because they don't have a sweetheart. Nonsense! If there is anyone in your life, parents, children, family, friends - love on them! As a sweet friend reminded me today, we never know what day will be our last and it's worth it to love on people because we all need love! Love on them as if today is your last day. Now, that's a memory worth remembering.

Jay and I are working real hard to better ourselves and work through years of emotional "stuff" and just "life" in general. So, we've been taking an emotional and spiritual journey of seeking God and just trying to figure this life out. Yeah, right, like that's probably never going to happen! But, I feel a rising within us that only God can do and a revolution is on it's way...

Well, those are my rambling thoughts for now.

Thank you, God, for being our ultimate Valentine - you gave your life for us and showed us how to love like you...

Uggh

Ya'll, seriously. Some days I just don't get it. I probably never will. Can you pray for me that I will have the heart of Jesus about something that causes me anxiety and a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach?

Matthew 11:28 -29 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."